Write, not Right

Here it is, the infamous day of reckoning - the start of a new year. I, for one, am all for fresh new starts. I am a fan of endings and beginnings, of external reasons to review, take inventory, clarify, modify, clean up, take stock, strategize, vision, view, expand, contract, define -- all that - it's all good. I tend to think, however, that there is a "right" way that I (and everyone) "should" do that, which then paralyzes me, because what if I do it "wrong"? Then I may as well not do it at all -- which, as I said, paralyzes me - stuck. in. a. fuzzy, undefined, not right or wrong rut.

Speaking of defining, let's just stop a sec and define that word...

rut (noun): a long deep track made by the repeated passage of the wheels of a vehicle  FIGURATIVE a habit or pattern of behavior that has become dull and unproductive but is hard to change.

So, on my quest to climb out of one of my personal ruts (the one where I don't post on my blog because I am afraid I have nothing to say that hasn't already been said better), I am just going to follow my own blog title and tagline for a change (that is, "ROBINWRITES! Revealing life one word at a time") instead of the title and tagline that flash in-between the lines of my goofy editor/perfectionist/self-critiquing writer mind (that might be, "ROBINHASNORIGHTTOWRITE! Unless she has it all figured out, polished, perfected, deep, meaningful, poetic, witty, wise, and ready to bring peace and love to all") Ha ha ha! Hey, I made myself laugh - now, THAT is funny Sometimes putting the truth into a sentence is so enlightening! May it set me free.

As well, I seem to have compiled some irrational laundry list of rules for what I ought to write here, there, everywhere. For instance...

• my stream of consciousness "morning pages" need their own (handwritten) journal in which I dump the blatherings that distract me from my true potential a la Artist Way...
  
• my dreams need their own journal in which I capture the detailed quests of each night, then sort and glean lessons of our collective and my own sub-conscious...
• my personal blog ought to include updated, magnificent photos of the beauty that inspires me and be filled with fun and fulfilling stories of me learning lessons, as well as tracking the ages and stages of development of the amazing family of peoples that surround me....
• I should write a poem every day (a good one at that)....
• my Laugh&Dream blog should be filled with links to compelling evidence for the benefits of Laughter and Dreaming for social evolution AND I aspire to include personal a-ha's and experiences from the depths of my being that will touch your very soul, giving you reason to connect with the JOY just waiting within.

Along with these self-expectations for my own writing, I honestly believe I ought to...

(a) pound out a good 20 hours toward my novel each week,

(b)consistently Tweet and FB insightful, useful status updates worthy of "re-tweet" and "Like" from Followers and Friends

(c) strategize, create and write marketing pieces for COPS Protective Services (because they really do sell amazing products to protect and serve)

(d) answer all my email promptly.....

No wonder I am at the computer all the freaking time, but never feel like I accomplish anything!

So I am going to try just spewing for awhile, right here, sorting through my own stuff on my own page, keeping track of how all that is going for me and what I'm finding useful toward the goal of getting out of this writing rut. And you are welcome to read it, if you want -- and, you don't have to....

This year, though, the first thing I do is give myself permission to write not right....or maybe that's write, not right. Or both. Yes. ;-)